Drowned

i remembered i was slowly dying inside.

i was sitting that day full of sadness

my eyes swell with tears

but i did not cry.

i was in front of the conputer monitors

when i received a text from my mother asking me if i’m okay

i lied.

before i drowned, I reached out to you,

i was ignored.

i promised myself ,

i won’t let you do it to me anymore,

no more tears.

soon anger filled me, revved me up.

it was hopeless. we were hopeless.

and once again,

in my empty bed in the dark night,

i feel empty like i used to be before you.